Last week we told you about Pinchbottom Burlesque’s newest science fiction show, “THE MORNING AFTER: Post-Apocalyptic Burlesque,” which will take place on Saturday, May 16 at 10:30 p.m. at the Bleecker Street Theater in New York. Our primary source of information about the show is the following garbled dispatch from the future, which has been decoded as follows:
INCOMING – FINAL TRANSMISSION FROM EARTH … it is THE MORNING AFTER the apocalypse … A small band of burlesque performers, under the leadership of Nasty Canasta, has survived …. but “Protector” Jonny Porkpie‘s provisional government has banned all forms of nakedness and forced us to become outcasts in a world we never made … we are attempting to rebuild society the only way we can: by taking off our clothes … if anyone out there still believes in the principles of truth, justice, and striptease, find us … find us now … the future nudity of humanity is at stake … find zzzzzzzzxqz …. MESSAGE INTERRUPTED
In order to cultivate a finer appreciation for dystopia (and nudity) among Tor.com’s readers, Pinchbottom kindly offered us a pair of tickets to give away, and John Joseph Adams is sweetening the pot with a copy of his Night Shade Books anthology Wastelands: Stories of the Apocalypse.
But such cool prizes must exact a toll, so we’re asking our readers to shock and amuse us with naughty puns based on titles or famous lines from dystopic or post-apocalyptic cultural artifacts.
We realize that “naughty pun” is not exactly a technical term, so we encourage you to use your imagination about how to interpret it. But we will throw you a bone and start you off with two examples from Tor.com’s own Steven Padnick: Mad Max: Beyond Thunder Thighs and “A Boy and His Doggie-Style.” For the next 24 hours, try your best to come up with entries as good as or better than those, and then the Tor.com team, Porkpie&Nasty, and JJA will put our heads together and pick our favorites.
One important caveat: since the bulk of this prize is a set of tickets to a live event in Manhattan, we’re going to have to pick the winner from among people who can actually attend said event. However, we don’t want to hamper our community’s creativity, so we’re going to accept non-competing entries from anyone who wants to play. Consequently: if you are a local who can (and wants to) come to the show, please tag your entries with #local. If you’re just punning for fun, please give your comments the #remote tag. Any entries that are not tagged will be presumed to be non-competing.
And now, the aforementioned legal mumbo-jumbo:
NO PURCHASE NECESSARY. A PURCHASE DOES NOT INCREASE YOUR CHANCES OF WINNING. To participate in the “Naughty Apocalypse” contest, leave a comment including a caption for the posted image in the comments section below, beginning Wednesday, 13 May, 2009 and ending on Thursday, 14 May, 2009. Winners will be selected on the basis of originality, humor and creativity, each factor applied equally. Open to registered users of Tor.com who are legal U.S. residents 18 years of age and older. Void in Puerto Rico and where prohibited by law. For complete Official Rules, go here. Sponsor: Tor.com, a division of Macmillan, 175 5th Avenue, New York, NY 10010.
Got it? Good. Ready set pun!
Despite the popularity of the Gothic during the Regency, I’ve personally found that the era clashes strongly with the genre (or perhaps, that Regency Romance clashes strongly with the Gothic). It’s somewhat of a relief to find that one of the authors I studied for inspiration for my Regency/Gothic RPG setting had trouble with the genre as well.
Well, you pinpoint all the reasons I dislike Cousin Kate. I still got creeped out by it, though- but maybe I was just young, I have not bothered to re read it in the last few years.
But surely she didn’t still have financial worries? I thought she was doing well by this stage, with Frederica and False Colours making lots of money and her copyright/financial/company issues fiancially cleared up. I am going by Jennifer Kloester’s biography but I should go back and re-read it.
Instead, she falls back on repeating many of the common myths about the
mentally ill: that animals hate them; that they are violent; that they
go insane during a full moon;
Wait, these are stereotypes of the mentally ill, and not signs someone is secretly a werewolf?
(Or the Duchess of Malfi’s insane brother, who thinks he’s a werewolf…)
Joking aside, I had no idea anyone actually thought that about the full moon and mentally ill people. Though I suppose “lunatic” should have been a clue.
Btw, I bought and read Faro’s Daughter based on your post here, and it was excellent!
A lake is inserted solely for the purpose of letting Torquil jump into
it (Heyer even admitted this in her proposal for the novel)
That is fascinating- is the proposal online or quoted somewhere? I would love to see how she put that across!
@Sean Bircher — Well, they are very different genres focusing on different elements, even when set in similar time spans: Gothic novels, after, often focus on isolation and fear and destruction, while Regency novels more usually focus on manners, social interactions, social structures, and constructing new social patterns. I do think that they can be combined, but it’s tricky — kudos for making the effort.
@Janjavi — Technically she didn’t have as many financial worries, no, but by this time she was sort of in the habit of worrying about money constantly and her relationships with Britain’s Internal Revenue were never good. Also, as Kloester notes, one of her brothers got very ill during this period and Heyer wanted to help him out financially.
@between4walls — I don’t know how prevalent the belief in a connection between the moon and insanity was, although it is referenced in the term “lunacy,” but Heyer seems to have believed it.
The proposal for Cousin Kate is quoted in full in Jane Aiken Hodge’s biography. I’ll just quote the bit about the lake:
“I don’t quite know yet what will happen to Torquil: he may drown himself in the lake — I’ll put one in, just in case I find I need it — but I daresay he will just be put under the aforementioned restraint. It doesn’t much matter, so I’ll let things take their accustomed course.”
Which right there explains a good deal of what’s wrong with the book.
Thanks for finding the quote!
Great review, although I do like the Nidds and Philip. I guess even a weak Heyer is better than most other books.
I am sure I could come up with some Heyer and Oz connections if I weren’t tired, other than the fact that my mother introduced me to both. The pointy shoes Inga hides the pearls in remind me of Regency shoes, for example…
William Lamb was married to Lady Caroline, not Lady Charlotte.
I have to disagree with you. “Cousin Kate” contains what is probably the most terrifying depiction of what a clinical narcissist looks like you’ll see anywhere – and this is long before the clinical description of the term achieved popular traction. Minerva Broome is very much the picture of a clinical narcissist – you can see it in her descriptions of how things have turned out, as they all centre on HER.
Minerva sees herself as the persecuted heroine of the piece: unable to have the come-out she deserved due to family financial issues, and forced to accept a second-rate minor peer who has no political ambition as a husband, she rises to become a Brilliant Hostess and Social Sinecure, before her triumph is snatched from her by her husband’s declining health. Exiled to the country, she seeks solace in learning the heritage of the family she is married into, but even there, her triumph is tainted – the male heir of the Unbroken Line of the Broomes turns out to have inherited insanity (through her own tainted family) and is not fit to be released upon society (alas for her renewed hopes of Social Success by proxy). When all seems lost, a godsend comes to her in the person of a niece she never knew about; the child of a half-brother many years her senior. The girl is healthy, young, and pretty, and better yet, since the hideous taint of insanity is from Minerva’s own mother’s family (an ancestry not shared by Kate) there’s a chance of breeding out the madness from the line. She finds the girl, and brings her to Staplewood, lavishing care upon her and ensuring her every physical need is met, planning to offer her the bargain: marry Torquil, and all this can be yours. But once again, her hopes are dashed, for the ungrateful wretch chooses to marry the son of her husband’s brother, thus ensuring the Unbroken Line of the Broomes will not be continued. How could fate be so cruel?
Minerva Malvern Broome is a narcissist, pure and simple – the world revolves around her, and any action she takes in the pursuit of her goals is Right and Necessary, and Good by implication. She doesn’t see anything wrong in isolating Kate from external influences (such as correspondence with Sarah, or friendships outside the house), because those external influences don’t see things the right way. At least ninety percent of Minerva’s argument with Phillip Broome is purely out of her own head – she sees him as scheming against her because he asks questions, and doesn’t accept her point of view as the One True Way. She’s aided and abetted in her narcissistic desire to control the perceptions of everyone around her by Doctor Delabole (who accepts her at her own valuation) and by her dresser, Sidlaw (who actively encourages it and promotes it at every turn). She limits the social contacts Sir Phillip has with his neighbours (by making any such contact a matter of high social form, constrained by rules of conduct and formality) and isolates him as well (classic abusive behaviour) so that he can’t get a fair picture of whether or not her conduct fits the standard pattern of normality.
Torquil may not be a convincing picture of someone who is mentally ill, but Minerva is a very convincing portrait of a personality disordered person.
I don’t think I’ve ever read this Heyer, which is strange because I adore Gothics, at least the good ones. Aside from the other authors from that period that you recommend, I’d add Elsie Lee. Her heroines are a bit snooty (well-educated and upper crust in attitude and behavior, even if they’re poor), but they also tend to be fierce and independent and don’t wait around to be rescued. Most are set in modern times (60s-70s), but she does some good historical ones too.